Lost in MY life

For Calvary on Campus we are doing the "poster board testimonials". This is a way for people to give a quick overview of what God has done in their life and to give God glory for his faithfulness. Essentially, we are to try to explain our pre-Christ life and then on the back, we flip it around and give a quick view of what God has done to correct that. It's a pretty cool way for us to share our faith a little and to help tell a small fraction of our story.

I was asked if I would be willing to do it. At first I resisted, I'm not completely sure why, but I felt like I could not quantify my pre-Christ existence in one simple phrase. I was disobedient to my parents, teachers, and people in authority. I didn't care for women like I was supposed to, I didn't protect them from sin or attempt to protect their emotions. I indulged in the party scene and cared more about how the people I was with viewed me, so I was able to "fake" what I thought they wanted to see and hear from me depending on who I was with. I was concerned with MY comfort, MY emotions, MY outward appearance. And in that lay the answer. My pre-Christ existence could be narrowed down to one thing: I was focused on MY life.

After coming to Christ (sort of when I was 16, actually when I was 20) the focus had to shift. It had to be HIS will, HIS glory, HIS life. Going through Men's Fraternity helped me understand how my actions affect not only me but people in my life, including women, my friends and my family. The view had to change from "it's my life why do you care?" to "how can I serve you better?". There are still areas I need to serve better in but I am slowly coming to ask that question more. It also meant giving up control, James 4:15-17 says:

"Instead, you ought to say, 'If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that' As it is you boast in your arrogant schemes. All such boasting is evil. If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn't do it, it is sin for them." (NIV)

Stacy gave a sermon on serving the other week and discussed one of the benefits of serving is that it takes the focus off us and onto others. Jesus himself says that the two greatest commandments are to love the lord your God with all your heart and to love your neighbor as yourself. We are to focus outwardly on others and on God's will and not on our own plans and ideas. My pre-Christ existence was measured by my life. How to make myself happy. In my Christ existence the question needs to be turned to how can I follow Christ, and how can I love others. I am still growing in that. I am getting better at serving others and keeping God in focus which has been a long process with a few dropped opportunities on the way, but thank God for grace.

Taking the focus off my life has also helped me to live my faith better. Earlier in James, James says,

"If one of you says to them, 'Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,' but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead." (James 2:16-17)

James is not saying that we need to EARN faith, but rather if we HAVE faith, there needs to be a radical change in how we live and who we focus on. I have seen that in my life for sure and hope to see it as I continue to grow in faith.

Looking at my pre-Christ existence was good. It helped me to reflect on how much I have grown in Christ and His amazing faithfulness. Reflecting on my past helped me realize even more how much I need Jesus and his grace, as well as the Holy Spirit and his guidance and work in my heart. Jeremiah 2:13 comes to mind when I think about living for myself.

"My people have committed two sins: They have forsaken me: the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water" (NIV)

We have substituted REAL life for MY life. We pour our life giving water into comforts, jobs, sex, drugs, and any number of broken cisterns but they cannot hold that water. Eventually the excitement and thrill of those things die, and we are left trying to find the next broken cistern to pour our water into. I know my pre-Christ existence embodied that. But when you turn to the source of that water, you no longer need those earthly goods and your vision turns outward.

Until next time, God Bless.

Relationships

Sunday night was an interesting night. I had homework due at 11:55 pm and I was anything but on top of it. In normal college student fashion, I had staved off the inevitable until the last possible moment and when the self-inflicted stress reached critical mass, I finally buckled down to do it. I returned to my apartment at about 9 pm and was slightly anxious about the amount of work I needed to do in the next three hours. It was do-able but I had to push everything aside and ignore all of the distractions that living with three other guys entails and put on my working pants.

As I began to get ready for the storm of computer programing I was about to pursue, my friend said he really wanted to talk to me about stuff. My friend had just recently accepted Christ as his savior, and we had been walking together with this "Christianity stuff". I told him this really wasn't a great time and I had homework to do and that I would catch him later. Fortunately, God had other plans for that evening. He was not about to let me miss my divine appointment that night and so when I sat down to do the first problem and could not get the computer program I was supposed to be writing to work, I began to panic. I kept getting the same error over and over again no matter how I changed my program to correct it. Finally, I was praying for a miracle to help me finish this. One more attempt.... nothing. So I decided I needed to step away from the problem and I told my friend I could meet him for a little to discuss what he wanted to discuss. Thank God I did.

He met me outside my apartment and we talked. He opened up to me about all sorts of crazy things going on in his life and things that God was teaching him. Unfortunately, sometimes growth comes at the cost of pain. I used the example of Eustace, the boy-dragon from C.S. Lewis' Voyage of the Dawn Treader, in my Jesus Camp High post to help illustrate the pain that comes with drastic transformation, and my friend is going through a "stripping of the flesh" experience for sure. It was hard to hear what was going on but it was AMAZING to see the conclusions and growth that he was experiencing from it. I offered to pray over him which he accepted and we went up to my apartment so that I could pray over him. I am excited to say God moved. For the first time ever, I spoke in tongues and saw a vision and those spiritual gifts did exactly as they were supposed to: they edified the body. My friend felt the Holy Spirit move all around us and he felt loved, strengthened and energized. I felt the rush of the Holy Spirit and was also strengthened and energized. It was a God story for sure.

I didn't finish all of my homework by the due date. Honestly, I should have not put it off, but I did come back and found the problem with the program I had written and managed to bang out a few more before the time was up. But God taught me something about that experience: relationships matter.

I have been battling with how we do church. How do we do Church better? Is the current format of church broken or is it merely just not being used the full potential? Is there even a problem at all? I have had discussions about this with many people, most of them a lot smarter and a lot more practiced in ministry than I. I have heard a vast array of responses, but they all agree on one thing: Relationship is needed. Most of the time spiritual growth has come for me, was in conversations with other people. People using their God-given spiritual gifts to teach, edify and stretch me. I have certainly heard amazing sermons and have learned from them, but many of my God experiences have come when I was meeting a few people, discussing God and walking together in life. Paul discusses church unity in Ephesians 4:

"But to each one of us Grace has been given as Christ apportioned it. This is why it says: 'When he ascended on high, he took many captives and gave gifts to his people.' ... So Christ himself gave the apostels, the prophets, the evangelists, the pastors and teachers, to equip his people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ" (Ephesians 4:7-13 NIV)

Let's start with that. Christ gives us gifts, gifts that we can use in conjunction with other people to build up the body of Christ. So relationship is important in order for the body to function. But let's take a step back and examine what does relationship mean?

The word "relationship" is a difficult word to nail down. Relationships are messy, and in that messiness, they are defined separately for each person. There is no standard relationship formula because as many different types of people, you need that many different types of relationships. However one principal is clear, relationships need to have mutual submission to one another. Jesus himself says to his disciples in Mathew 20:25-28:

"Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever want to be first must be your slave- just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many." (NIV)

Jesus is explaining that it needs to not be about prestige and honor but about loving one another and submitting fully to each other. We have to shed our pride and be willing to serve the other side of the relationship. I did not do a good job of doing that Sunday night. I was too caught up in my own work that I forgot to love my friend and serve him. God forced me to back away from my stuff and to focus on him and I am so thankful I did.

Let's focus on doing life together so that we can build one another up. Let's step outside ourselves and put another persons needs before our own and submit to them just as Christ submitted to us. I know that if we do that, we will start to see some amazing, life-transforming, kingdom-building changes in how the Body works.

Until next time, God Bless.

Pride

Wow! Sorry about the long break. Once the summer came blogging went on the back burner a little but as school approaches I want to get into it again! So here we go:

Below are links to two articles that Bruce Eveleth sent me regarding high profile pastors that have stepped down citing issues with pride as their reasons and some reasons why Pastors are vulnerable to this low profile sin.

http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2011/julyweb-only/sexmoneypride.html

http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2011/julyweb-only/mostriskyprofession.html

Pride is a tough sin. Where do you draw the line between an accurate view of your own worth and over emphasizing your worth? I think that one issue that wasn't touched on was "professional pastors" in that their job is to get people into their church so that they can make a living. Even if they do not have a huge salary, if no one is coming and giving an offering, the pastors will have to find other means of income. So the emphasis is on bringing in more people and just like in any profession, if you're successful then there is a little ego boost that comes with it. As a prospect interested in entering that industry, it is something that I need to be mindful of.


I was blessed to be asked to lead a college life group this summer and in doing so had to battle with my own pride. I only had two people come to my first life group out of about 15 that I asked or who voiced interest in coming. I was rather disheartened by the turn out the first meeting, I must admit, but I decided that it wasn't my life group it was God's and that whomever he trusted to me I would do my best to equip them to spread God's glory. Since then I have had 4 regular attenders but I have been extremely encouraged by the growth and discussions we have had. It is not big but once I stepped aside and allowed God to control it, I was amazed at the conversations and the growth TOGETHER that was coming from the conversations.


I think that is the key to remaining humble. Hebrews 11:2:

"Having our eyes fixed on Jesus, the guide and end of our faith, who went through the pains of the cross, not caring for the shame, because of the joy which was before him, and who has now taken his place at the right hand of God's seat of power." 

If we fix our eyes on the Kingdom and on Jesus and recognize that the fruit of our labor is his glory and not our own, we can rejoice in our successes without the sin of pride. Paul says in Galatians 6:14,

"May I never boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, through which the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world." (NIV)

I think once we take our eyes off Jesus and the cross and begin to build up our own kingdom on Earth, we can forget the main goal which is to spread God's glory and not our own.


I do feel this is all easier said than done. I feel we often rest on our own strength and power and when we succeed, we are quick to give credit to ourselves. Through out the Bible, God called people of low status in society to spread his glory for that very reason. Jesus himself was a child born out of wedlock, to a lower middle class carpenter. He could have chosen to be born to a king and had more influence but he wanted the glory to be God's. So if we are focusing on Jesus and attempting to walk in his footsteps, we should be resting on the power of the Holy Spirit and all he has to offer and not on ourselves. We have to be open to God's correction and follow discipline, surround ourselves with godly men and women who we are open and vulnerable with and who will hold us accountable. As Stacy Sublett would say, we need to be "disciplined and teachable".


Until next time, God Bless.