I grew up in State College, I have lived here 22 years this past September. I attended and graduated from State College Area High School as did my Mom, and as did both her parents. I am fairly certain but not positive that my Grandma’s mother (my Great-Grandma, my Mom’s Grandma) also grew up in State College. My Grandpa attended Penn State, as did my Mom. Additionally my Grandma on my Father’s side attended Penn State and so did my Father. I have had cousins, sisters, Grandparents and parents grow up in this town, and attend college in this town. Obviously, I currently attend Penn State and so does my Sister. Needless to say, I have strong roots that go down in this area. This is my home.
Growing up here, it was always viewed as the best place to raise children. We continuously have one of the lowest violent crime rates per capita according to the FBI Uniform Crime Report and have very seldom felt the effects of the “outer world”. I lived in a small city utopia where everyone knew everyone but we were still more educated, more athletic and wealthier than the surrounding "hick-towns” (Tongue-in-cheek intended). And though I wasn’t old enough to recognize it at the time, State College was not the real world. If you have ever seen the movie “Pleasantville” that is sort of how I view my youth in State College. But, unlike in movies, nothing is ever perfect.
As it turns out, our town was not so utopian after all. Our “omni-benevolent” leaders who had shaped and defined us, who had taught us to be honest, and to fight clean, to be humble and to let your actions do the talking, who had reached a level of reverence in the eyes of the town that was unhealthy and crossed the line into idolatry, were in fact, sweeping sins, poor-judgment, and passivity under the rug. A man who was identified as a “hometown hero”, who retired from football in his prime to “spend more time” with his organization helping to give a future to at-risk boys, who at the asking of a relative stranger, was willing to make time in his busy day to call and talk to a young man who was struggling to come to grips with manhood and encourage and reaffirm him, was, allegedly, preying on the boys he had retired to “help”. Since Saturday November 5th 2011, my youthful heros have toppled.
This may seem melodramatic, and perhaps it is, but growing up in this town, we used to pride ourselves on winning “the right way”. We didn’t need to cheat to be good like those boys down in Miami or those hoodlums in Ohio State, we were upright, clean, and respectable. But this gets me to my point. This whole crumbling of the men who I once held up as heros has made me identify where my faith is held. Without even knowing it, the pain and anger I am feeling is proof that I had put my faith, my hope and my trust into men who were nothing more than men. They were not God, and for all of the good that they had done for the community and for my town, they were still men.
I don’t feel I am alone in this. I think that much of the pain that people are feeling due to Mr. Paterno’s announcement of retirement is proof that even those who did not grow up in State College have forced a man-sized filler into a God-sized hole. The truth is, if God was where our hope was, rather than wasting energy trying to make our opinions heard by anyone who would hear them, we would be focusing them to pray for the victims. Rather than screaming vulgar slurs at Sandusky, we would be working to forgive. Rather than organizing mobs, we would be organizing fundraisers to donate to victim relief organizations like Centre County Woman’s Resource Center, RAINN, Centre County Child Access Center, and the Youth Service Bureau of State College to help stop the cycle of abuse that accounts for approximately one-third of the abusive parents and adults.
The truth is that our hope should be in God and not men. This doesn’t mean we build walls around our hearts to keep others at a distance, but in fact, it means the opposite. It means that if God is where our hope is, we can grow close and not fear being let down. We can forgive quickly, easily and freely, giving grace and forgiveness “just as God forgave you”(Col 3:12-14). This does not mean live apathetically, but rather empathetically, allowing God to break our hearts for discipline, to grow or just because he wants to spur us on and give us the strength and drive to pursue that which he has laid on our hearts because He has our trust and hope (Matt 14:14). Living in fear is not putting our trust in the Lord but trusting in the Lord allows us to live freely (Col 3:1-4).
Perhaps your “man-sized hole” is not Joe Paterno or Jerry Sandusky, perhaps it is any number of things, many of which are toted about in church and in the Bible. I hope though that you will take this time to examine where your hope is. Because if it’s anywhere besides Jesus, at some point God will most likely test that area because he loves us and “he disciplines us for our own good so that we may share in his holiness” (Hebrews 12:4-11).
Until next time, God bless.
